The Hardest Goodbye


Some goodbyes are great, they can’t come fast enough…good riddance. And some goodbyes are incredibly difficult. When it comes to matters of the heart, there is always grey area. It’s never as simple as a mathematical equation where there is a simple right or wrong answer.

When two people have shared beautiful and genuine experiences, it can be difficult to say goodbye. Never is it, “all bad”, because usually it’s “mostly good”. This is what makes it so hard sometimes to let go. We cling to the parts we love about each other and try to pretend that the things we disagree on or differ in, aren’t so bad. We cling to the idea of what it could be. And maybe the differences aren’t all that big, but somehow big enough that you can’t ignore or even accept them. It can be so difficult to know where to draw a hard line. Sometimes it’s easy to see, but not always. It can be even more challenging when it’s, “so close to everything you’ve looked for in someone,” with only a prediction of future issues. These red flags are harder to spot, because they’re not always definitively red. They might not even be close to a shade of red. Sometimes it’s just a knowing that you want them to be just a little different, but this is a recipe for disaster. And I suppose you could call that a red flag. It’s definitely a problem when we begin to hope that someone will change, or see things our way. It’s even worse when we try to convince them to change… this will NEVER work. For a truly healthy relationship, two people need be ready and willing to accept every single thing about the other person, share nearly identical foundational core beliefs, and have no fear in communicating feelings and needs with complete honesty.

So when we find ourselves questioning whether or not to say goodbye, it becomes imperative to trust that inner knowing that you’re making the right decision. Using logic and reason can only get you so far. Sometimes you’ve gotta double down and let your wisdom and intuition guide you. Because sometimes the right decisions in love are not at all logical.

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